Yes you can guess it by now, it’s him. Michael Jackson. I heard the shocking news early in the morning, a friend told me. Felt my heart break, something wrong with my throat, seemed hard to swallow. Loads of status updates in facebook are about him. With each of their own way, people expressing their feelings towards him. Nobody knew him personally. He’s a superstar, a legend, and lives long way from here, but yet all these people show their last respect. Even just in status updates.

I have my own dream-no matter how silly it was- that I’ll be meeting him someday. A teenager’s favorite daydreaming for her favorite pop star. I still remember it very well, the visualization of it. At that time, I felt a strong ‘connection’ with my favorite star, because we share the same sign : Virgo, only 2 days in difference. Yes you may laugh a bit now about this, but anyway, am a person who believes in those signs, stars constellation, birth chart, numerology, you name it.

I haven’t met any so-called godly creatures or maybe just a simple angel to know how they possibly sound, but I believe it must be like the way he sings. The songs are so alive and moving. I guess that’s why people still adores him, in the middle of all the negative judgment addressed to him and everything around his life. If you can see the human quality of a man, he’s one of the kind.

I remember -long time ago- I pushed myself to save my pocket money to buy his latest album ‘Dangerous’. The cover was so fantastic! It again, evoked my teenager’s fantasy meeting him. In person. I heard it over and over again, repeated each side of the cassette, till I almost knew the song by heart. It was those memorable time, that I remember singing to myself at the top of my lungs! What a day..

But then time flies, am not again connected well with my daydreaming about him. Day by day, I have my own ‘busy’ life, pop stars come and go, once in a while I saw the news about him: got married with Elvis Presley’s daughter, divorced, have another wife, children, accused for molested a child, accused for not being a good father –the balcony incident-, got divorced from the second wife, etc. My fantasy of him once, start to fade away by time.

Then this news, a sudden death. They say a heart attack. Suddenly I felt the need to bring back the memories of him. Trying to find his songs in my MP3 files. Couldn’t find any. Found it over the internet, downloaded them, and to my surprise, I remember the lyrics. It turned out that it’s still fresh in the back of my head.

He finally set free, a soul trapped in a ‘wacko’ body, free from being continually misunderstood. A soul must thank another soul to be part of their life. So I thank you to be part of my teenager’s life, part of my fantasy, part of my weary but beautiful daydreaming. May you find your eternal peace..